...writing along with my kids again

I occasionally give my students a time to free write - eight to fifteen minutes, usually. Sometimes I have to get a couple things set up as they write, but many times I try to write with them. Last week, I joined my students in one class for most of their 15 minute free write, and I thought it was worth sharing here. It's interesting to note that this happened the morning of a Friday that later ended with a bit of a breakdown of frustration in another class that had one astute student stay afterward to tell me that she likes my class and likes me, but knows this isn't where I want to be and that if I want to go, I "should just go." How things change in the course of a day. But I think this more accurately reflects my mindset than any breakdown of frustration.

"Ugh. It's amazing that my first year of teaching is almost over. After a month of long term subbing last year, I was so frightened this first year would never happen. How could I last a year? Well, I practically have, and I don't have a good explanation for it besides the grace of God. I know he's brought me here for a reason, reasons I probably won't ever even realize because it would only be through this [teaching in Honduras] not happening that I'd realize how rough it could be outside of this school. I know that having a community is important and essential for me. I have that here. Although I've struggled, how much more could I have struggled at a "better" school that didn't have a community like this one built in? Would the "better" students really have made me try harder as a teacher? Would a more whip-cracking principal really have gotten my nose to the grindstone? Or would I have been fired after the first semester for being just as apathetic as I am here and letting my students down? I wonder...

I wouldn't have gotten together with Kristin this year if I were at another school. [Rest of paragraph omitted - this blog's about Honduras, not my dating life! :)]

I am excited about next year. A new set of kids, a new set of possibilities. I'll know what I'm doing more than at the beginning of this year. Kristin and I will be together to start the year out, and adding Matt to my living situation sounds excellent. I hope my mind is in a much better state after a summer of getting help. Everything has such great potential. I just hope I can live out my excitement for it."

I now have 11 more days of classes to plan, then four days of half-days of exams. I have a TON of grading to do, including a nice stack of research papers I'll be getting this Wednesday. School is done the 4th of June, and then we have a bunch of unknown stuff that will take up two freaking full weeks. I'll be home (Michigan at least) around 10am on June 20 and will be going immediately to a Tigers game. Sleeping in my own bed again that night. Working the next day? It's possible - I have to get my planting time in! My first days back are already being planned - restaurants to hit, trip to Chicago, comforts of home to enjoy, books to read. The seven weeks (that's it...) will go so fast. I mean, I still have five weeks here. Holy yeesh.